WaterBoyz » mission statement

Espress Yourself

e_train — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 20:15:04 +0000

From Norm Su, whose work as the WaterBoyz’ official coffee broker is unsurpassed in the industry, comes another caffeine cocktail, LavAzza Caffe Espresso, sure to provide that extra pep in your step.

Enjoy a cup with some sugar and/or cream from our state-of-the-art refrigeration units located next door to HQ.

WaterBoyz Productz Update

e_train — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 22:20:05 +0000

Attention: The WaterBoyz will no longer be serving “Kirkland Signature 100% Colombian Coffee Supremo Bean/Dark Roast/Fine Grind.

Why?

We have unanimously decided that it is rank. Stay far, far away. But if you like imbibing black liquid that tastes like a diabolical combination of motor oil and burnt rubber, this might be the stuff for you. The WaterBoyz, however, will pass. Sorry, Costco!

Figure 1. I wanna ralph SO hard right now.

Public Endorsement: Conan O’Brien

bkoehne — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 00:53:18 +0000

We, the WaterBoyz, do publicly endorse Conan O’Brien, the classy and very talented funny man of The Tonight Show. Having just been screwed over by NBC and probably about to leave the network soon, we support Conan’s decision and wish him a smooth transition to his new endeavors. To put it in different terms: “Conan O’Brien just poured cold water all over NBC Universal’s plan to squeeze in all three of its late night comedians into a new lineup.” (Source)

Our regular readers might ask: Why the endorsement of Conan? Well, even the experts in all things concerning water need some inspiration from time to time. Conan has always provided us with the important humorous underpinnings of our work and is thus essential for our very own work.

Here’s another proof of the power of water. Even Coco’s famous hair style cannot resist:

From the people of earth: Good luck, Conan!

Do you like WATER?

e_train — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 20:19:59 +0000

Dear Highly-Valued Future Customer of WaterBoyz.biz:

My name is Erik Trainer–no that is not a pseudonym. And I LIKE WATER TOO.

So much in fact that my good friend BEN and I are launching a WATER-BASED SERVICE. But if you are reading these words, there is a good chance you already knew that. I’m even willing to bet that you KNOW HOW TO DRINK WATER.

Of course you do. We all need water. I’m sure you’ve had AT LEAST ONE WATER INTERACTION today! Water is like the color white; it goes with everything. In particular:
–Tea
–Coffee
(these two require a bit of “heat”)
–Slip ‘n’ slides
–Itself
–Soap
–Frozen water blocks (also referred to as “ice cubes”)
–Food
–A Parched Throat
–Boats
–Exercise
–Laundry
–Scotch

See? Water is BRILLIANT. You already knew that though. You’re so so smart.

At WATERBOYZ.BIZ we take NO WATER FOR GRANTED. We’re the one-stop-shop for all of your h20-based needs. That’s our promise to you. We promise.

Cheers,
–WATERBOYZ